the signs as…. I don’t fuckin know oven temperatures
Leo: 325°F
Libra: 400°F
Cancer: 350°F
Virgo: 300°F
Aries: 275°F
Sagittarius: 150°F
Aquarius: 225°F
Gemini: 425°F
Scorpio: 150°F
Taurus: 125°F
Capricorn: 0°F
Pisces: -250°F
this is so me
my mother just opened our dishwasher and said “oh my god our dishes!”
our dishwasher broke over a year ago
our missing dishes have been in the dishwasher since 2013
the mystery has been solved
I just want to add that my grandmother found out when talking to my mother and had to hang up the call because she was so ashamed of us
The signs as Marvel Superheroes
Aries: Thor
Taurus: Spider Man
Gemini: Hulk
Cancer: Wolverine
Leo: Iron Man
Virgo: Captain Marvel
Libra: Black Widow
Scorpio: Daredevil
Sagittarius: Ant-Man
Capricorn: Luke Cage
Aquarius: Captain America
Pisces: Hawkeye
The five most reassuring words ever are: “I haven’t started yet either”